Today’s reading is a guided meditation. It is another attempt at Self-inquiry, this time coming at Self-inquiry from a different angle than NTI 2 Corinthians 12.
Today’s Self-inquiry focuses on feelings. As you read and practice today’s Self-inquiry, you will be led through five steps:
- Take time to get quiet.
- Ask to see the feelings that are within you. Notice the different feelings that arise.
- Go deeper, still noticing feelings. In this step, you are looking for the feeling of ‘me.’ It has a distinctness about it.
- After you notice the feeling of ‘me,’ ask to see what is beyond that.
- Allow yourself to experience that which is beyond ‘me.’
When you go through this meditation, you may notice a lot of different feelings at Step 2. Don’t rush through Step 2. When a feeling arises to be seen, notice it, acknowledge it, and then ask, “Is there something else here to be seen?” Stay with Step 2 until you feel you have fully experienced the feelings at this level.
The feeling of ‘me’ is a very interesting feeling. I have come to recognize it easily as an object—not as ‘me’ at all—but in the beginning that wasn’t the case. It was a feeling I lived with everyday and took for ‘me’ without ever looking at it directly. The first time I ever noticed it was during this meditation, and there was a strong pull to stop there. There was a strong idea that nothing was beyond it. That’s why the reading says:
You may seem to come to a very personal feeling. It may seem strong, like a wall. This feeling tells you that you are what you are not, so do not pause to listen to it.
I was guided not to listen to the idea that there was nothing beyond the feeling of ‘me.’ I was guided to continue and discover what was beyond that “wall.”
This meditation taught me that the wall—the personal feeling of ‘me’—and all of the feelings I found before the wall were not me. The lighter, non-attached Self that I found beyond ‘me’ is what I am. You could say this meditation was my first successful Self-inquiry.
When you go through the reading today, read slowly. Pause and practice the steps as you go through them. Look at the feelings before the wall, notice the wall itself, and then go beyond it.
What is beyond that feeling of ‘me’?
If you can know that which is beyond the feeling of ‘me,’ can you be that ‘me’?
Thoughts of Awakening # 204
The individual self
is an illusion,
because the idea of individual self
says that there is a “me”
who stands apart from “you.”
It does not see
that the experience itself
comes from one creation.
Creation and creator are one,
because the process of creation
is creator,
and creation cannot be apart from
the process.
This need not be understood,
but it must be accepted,
if one is to see why or how
to love
his brother as his Self.
~From our Holy Spirit
Homework for this week
- Practice daily meditation for 30-60 minutes each day.
- Practice the “Loving All” Method.
- Thoughts of Awakening, 204-210 including Commentary on Obedience (with 206), Commentary on the World (with 207), Commentary on the Wish to Be Independent (with 208), Commentary on Peace (with 209) & Commentary on Listening (with 210).
- Read NTI Philippians 3 & 4 (No NTI reading on days 206-210).
