Our current goals:
- Widen the horizons of our vision
- Take direct approaches to uncover the blocks that keep our vision narrow
- Lift those blocks, however briefly, in order to experience the sense of liberation that comes when the blocks are removed
- Intensify our motivation for freedom
“It can be but myself I crucify. When this is firmly understood and kept in full awareness, you will not attempt to harm yourself, nor make your body slave to vengeance. You will not attack yourself, and you will realize that to attack another is but to attack yourself.”
It may be helpful to read this first paragraph (above) from today’s lesson slowly several times.
There is a crazy idea in the mind that our salvation lies in attacking someone (or something) outside of our self. Today’s lesson calls this idea a “form of madness you believe.”
The best way to see this is true is to pay attention. Pay attention when you attack someone (or something), regardless of whether you attack physically, verbally or with your thoughts. Pay attention for the feeling or idea that you can gain something through attack. Maybe you think you can get your way, and that will make you feel safe or happy. Maybe there is a feeling that you rise up as you put others down. Maybe you feel you are protecting someone or some important value. Regardless of what it is that you think you may gain, notice that you believe your salvation lies in attack.
Next, notice that you actually crucify yourself whenever you attack. Pay close attention to how you feel when you attack. Is that joy? Peace? Love? Or are your emotions more negative? You probably feel anger, jealousy, lack, annoyance, resentment or some other type of upset. At best you may feel righteous indignation. Aren’t those feelings types of suffering? Aren’t you actually creating your own suffering through attack?
Attack is not salvation. Attack is a form of self-sabotage. To see this clearly is the first step in letting go of attack forever.
Today’s lesson says, “Today’s idea is one step we take in leading us from bondage to the state of perfect freedom.” When you see how you keep yourself in bondage through attack, you also see how sensible this statement is.
The lesson also says, “It is not time we need for this. It is but willingness.”
Time has nothing to do with giving up attack. Willingness is everything. Without willingness, we can go a very long time with no change in our attack habits. With great willingness, we can give up attack instantaneously. We can become willing to give up attack when we see that we do not gain through attack; we increase our own pain.
If you have an attack habit, it is helpful to pause every hour and look back on the last hour to see if there were any recent attacks. If there were attacks in the last hour, inquire into them. What did you think you’d gain through attack? What did you actually receive, happiness or prolonged agitation?
At the very least, review the day at the end of each day, and inquire into the attacks you find in your review.
By bringing right-awareness to your attack habit, the willingness to let go of the habit will increase. As willingness increases, you will begin to find ways (feel intuitive guidance) to let go before you attack.