Today’s reading tells two stories, one that highlights thinking as a guide and one that highlights intuition and spontaneity as a guide.
The first story is about Judas’ decision to help the chief priests arrest Jesus. The interesting thing about the thinking revealed in the story is that it appears reasonable under the circumstances. Let’s put ourselves in Judas’ position and look at his thinking from his point-of-view.
While sitting on the Mount of Olives earlier in the day, Jesus revealed deep truths to the apostles about the world, the oneness of consciousness, and the pure awareness of the absolute, in which the world disappears. This was the first time Jesus shared these truths with the apostles as a whole. He had shared these teachings with Peter, James and John while on a mountain retreat with them, and the teachings had scared Peter. Now, Judas experienced that same fear. (Reference the tip for Day 43)
While Judas’ mind was reeling from the newly revealed teachings, he looked at Jesus through that fear and saw what appeared to be self-indulgence. Jesus allowed a woman to massage his head and feet with a very expensive perfume. She told Jesus over and over again how much she loved him as he sat there smiling. It looked like he loved the admiring attention.
Judas’ fear increased as his thoughts went on-and-on about the outrageous teachings from that afternoon and the hedonistic display in front of him now. He couldn’t see clearly. He didn’t know how to tell what was true and what was not true. And then an idea occurred to him: If Jesus was put on trial before the chief priests, everything would become clear. They would know the questions to ask. Given the opportunity to interview him fully, they would know if Jesus was genuine or not.
Remember, Judas was raised to trust the chief priests. This line of thinking made sense to him. He concluded that the best thing to do was to turn Jesus in to the chief priests. Judas didn’t know that the best thing to do while in fear is to rest-accept-trust until the fear passes.
The second story in today’s reading is about the apostles learning to follow intuition. Interestingly, they are also afraid. However, their fear is different. Instead of being afraid of Jesus and the teachings, they are afraid of stepping outside of the thinking mind.
Like most people, the apostles believed that thinking protected them. On this day, Jesus asked the apostles to go into Jerusalem without a plan, and trust intuition and spontaneity to lead them to a room that could be used for Passover. The thinking that arose in their minds might have encouraged them to do something different. For example, the mind might have said something like, “Just go knock on Mark’s mother’s door. She lives in Jerusalem. She will provide a room.”
It can be difficult to trust intuition and spontaneity over thinking and the urge to take control. We can feel like we are stepping outside of safety. However, remember this quote from Nisargadatta Maharaj:
That which sees all this, and the nothing too, is the inner teacher. He alone is; all else only appears to be. He is your own swarupa (true Self), your hope and assurance of freedom; find him and cling to him and you will be saved and safe.
Fortunately, the apostles did not listen to fear. They did not follow the urgings of the mind. They waited to see what would happen without taking the matter into their own hands first, and they were led to the perfect place for Passover. They were led to place that wasn’t associated with Jesus or with them, and so it was a safe place where the temple guards would not find them.
Thoughts of Awakening # 54
Love is the way
that leads from the Heart,
‘though it be hidden beneath
murky flood waters
of pain and fear.
Let the waters pass over you,
that they may be gone;
the love that rested beneath them
shall rise and brighten your mind.
~From our Holy Spirit
