{"id":42362,"date":"2019-09-07T23:25:38","date_gmt":"2019-09-08T05:25:38","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/awakening-together.org\/dev2\/?p=42362"},"modified":"2019-09-06T11:45:55","modified_gmt":"2019-09-06T17:45:55","slug":"healing-the-i-am-bad-belief-by-francine-wright","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/awakening-together.org\/dev2\/healing-the-i-am-bad-belief-by-francine-wright\/","title":{"rendered":"Healing the &#8216;I Am Bad&#8217; Belief by Francine Wright"},"content":{"rendered":"<h3><strong><span style=\"color: #008000;\">Reflections from the Retreat House<br \/>\n<\/span><\/strong>From the retreat about &#8220;Releasing the &#8216;I Am Bad&#8217; Belief&#8221;<\/h3>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft wp-image-42363 size-medium\" src=\"https:\/\/awakening-together.org\/dev2\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/09\/Francine-e1567791379142-225x300.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"225\" height=\"300\" srcset=\"https:\/\/awakening-together.org\/dev2\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/09\/Francine-e1567791379142-225x300.jpg 225w, https:\/\/awakening-together.org\/dev2\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/09\/Francine-e1567791379142-768x1024.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 225px) 100vw, 225px\" \/>The very first day of our retreat we went around the room sharing whatever we felt comfortable to share about how the \u2018I am bad belief\u2019 affected us. I was shocked to hear how we all felt fundamentally flawed. I could see the discomfort on everyone\u2019s face as they shared, and how convinced we all are that somehow we are guilty for the many situations we find ourselves in. Some of the stories about health issues matched my experience almost verbatim. It was very helpful for me to see that I was not alone in my belief in guilt about my health. Other stories were different than mine but they all had the same underlying \u2018I am bad belief\u2019. There are no words to describe how eye opening this group sharing was for me.\u00a0I had to be there and see for myself; no audios could have replaced the clarity that came up for me at that moment. It helped me realize at a much deeper level how we all have been carrying for years the same burden, \u2018I am scum of the earth\u2019 or some other damaging attribute. \u00a0On that very first day, I received more Aha moments than I had hoped to receive throughout the entire retreat. I felt this was a turning point in my life, and this was only day one.<\/p>\n<p><strong>The Two Evaluations:<br \/>\n<\/strong><strong>Ego Evaluation:<\/strong>Another deep eye opener was when Regina asked us to interview the ego as the observer and ask \u2018what it thought about each one of us\u2019. I had never heard of that exercise before so I was a little skeptical that anything helpful could come out of it for me. Boy was I wrong! When I asked the question as the observer \u2018what do you think about Francine, there was no hesitation\u2026the ego blasted \u2018Francine is boring.\u2019 It became crystal clear to me that this perception had been running below the surface and affecting my life in many ways. When I shared the ego\u2019s perception of me with the group, Regina\u2019s and Jacquelyn\u2019s expressions was worth a thousand words&#8230; They totally did not view me as boring. I replied, \u2018how can you not see that I\u2019m the most boring person on the planet? \u00a0The others in the group also did not share my perception of myself but since I have known Jacquelyn and Regina for a few years, there response to how I perceived myself was VERY impactful. Although I had been aware of this perception in my head, it felt like a new discovery. Again, this was huge for me. How could I have been so wrong about my perception of myself! I was beginning to gain more clarity on how believing ego thoughts is a complete lie and extremely damaging.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Holy Spirit\u2019s Evaluation:<\/strong>Then we contemplated Holy Spirit\u2019s assessment of me:\u00a0 \u201c<strong>You shine radiant with bliss, with peace, with sweetness and purity\u201d by Yoga Vasistha. <\/strong>What a contrast between the ego\u2019s and the Holy Spirit\u2019s perception! How loving, how beautiful, how freeing it would be to know in my heart that Holy Spirit\u2019s perception of me is the truth! I could feel the truth of it but I have a lot of work to do to cement it. This is a big one for me to work on, but it is also very exciting. So much resistance has falling away &#8211; at least for now.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Root Cause Inquiry:<\/strong>We had another exercise of journaling about our most disruptive \u2018I am bad belief\u2019.\u00a0 The root cause revealed that \u2018<em>I am scum of the earth\u2019, <\/em>which is the root cause of many of my beliefs so that was not new. As I had experienced many times before, I felt stuck, and helpless to let it go so I asked Regina what to do<em>. <\/em>She told me to pray about it<em>\u2013 Holy Spirit, how can I let go of this belief that I am \u2018scum of the earth\u2019? I\u2019m willing to hear anything that you\u2019ll share with me<\/em>.\u2019 It sounds so simple. Why didn\u2019t I think of this myself? The ego hides our most helpful tools from us. I had a very healing contemplation of the \u2018I am bad\u2019 belief, and I feel more equipped to use prayer as a means to release my beliefs when I feel stuck.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Is Attack Possible?<\/strong>We talked about \u2018Is attack possible\u2019? The answer is No, attack is not possible. It\u2019s all about what I am believing \u2013 never about truth. So when I am upset for any reason, ask \u2018<strong>what am I believing about myself\u2019<\/strong>? <strong>What I am believing is never the truth about myself so why be afraid to go there?<\/strong>Regina said to trust I am healing, trust the Holy Spirit is right and I am wrong about my feelings. Trust that I have never been bad. A belief says \u201cI am right\u2019, it\u2019s a fact; trust it is wrong. At some point you\u2019ll see you made this up. <strong>Trusting you\u2019re wrong will carry\u00a0<\/strong><strong>you through it even if it\u2019s not 100% trust.<\/strong>\u00a0 Jacquelyn had a wonderful, very clear homily on this topic at the 8-18-19 gathering: \u201cBelieving is Seeing\u201d. This trust and clarity I had during the retreat made root cause inquiry enjoyable because I knew I was letting go of being trapped.<\/p>\n<p>There are countless gems we received during the retreat. I went home feeling so light, like a big weight had been lifted. That feeling of being light weight has dimmed but one thing is for sure, I remember the sharing, and the \u2018Aha moments, and I continue to feel optimistic that I can let go of the \u2018I am bad belief\u2019. \u00a0We were reminded of so many tools: Rest, Accept and Trust and self-coaching when the mind goes crazy, and journaling when the ego hides our beliefs. Regina shared examples from her journal, as well as handouts about many teachings she received from Spirit.<\/p>\n<p>If it weren\u2019t for the shared retreat with my Awakening-Together friends, I would not have received the experience and clarity about how flawed my thinking is. It was absolutely necessary for me to attend this retreat, and I am so grateful I did. Now I really have something to work with. The tools are more obvious and there is less resistance. Yippee!<\/p>\n<p>I\u2019m also grateful for our great cook, Shiryl Kaplan who is always so welcoming. She has a genuine interest in each one of us and goes out of her way to be helpful.<\/p>\n<p>Thank you Regina and everyone for making this retreat such a success for me.<\/p>\n<p>Love to All,<br \/>\nFrancine<\/p>\n<h5><\/h5>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Reflections from the Retreat House From the retreat about &#8220;Releasing the &#8216;I Am Bad&#8217; Belief&#8221; The very first day of our retreat we went around the room sharing whatever we felt comfortable to share about how the \u2018I am bad belief\u2019 affected us. I was shocked to hear how we all felt fundamentally flawed. I [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":42363,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_exactmetrics_skip_tracking":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_active":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_note":"","_exactmetrics_sitenote_category":0,"_genesis_hide_title":false,"_genesis_hide_breadcrumbs":false,"_genesis_hide_singular_image":false,"_genesis_hide_footer_widgets":false,"_genesis_custom_body_class":"","_genesis_custom_post_class":"","_genesis_layout":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[33,88],"tags":[],"class_list":{"0":"post-42362","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-blog","8":"category-sidebar","9":"entry"},"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.5 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Healing the &#039;I Am Bad&#039; Belief by Francine Wright - Awakening Together<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/awakening-together.org\/dev2\/healing-the-i-am-bad-belief-by-francine-wright\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Healing the &#039;I Am Bad&#039; Belief by Francine Wright - Awakening Together\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Reflections from the Retreat House From the retreat about &#8220;Releasing the &#8216;I Am Bad&#8217; Belief&#8221; The very first day of our retreat we went around the room sharing whatever we felt comfortable to share about how the \u2018I am bad belief\u2019 affected us. I was shocked to hear how we all felt fundamentally flawed. 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