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Healing the ‘I Am Bad’ Belief by Francine Wright

September 7, 2019 By Regina Dawn Akers

Reflections from the Retreat House
From the retreat about “Releasing the ‘I Am Bad’ Belief”

The very first day of our retreat we went around the room sharing whatever we felt comfortable to share about how the ‘I am bad belief’ affected us. I was shocked to hear how we all felt fundamentally flawed. I could see the discomfort on everyone’s face as they shared, and how convinced we all are that somehow we are guilty for the many situations we find ourselves in. Some of the stories about health issues matched my experience almost verbatim. It was very helpful for me to see that I was not alone in my belief in guilt about my health. Other stories were different than mine but they all had the same underlying ‘I am bad belief’. There are no words to describe how eye opening this group sharing was for me. I had to be there and see for myself; no audios could have replaced the clarity that came up for me at that moment. It helped me realize at a much deeper level how we all have been carrying for years the same burden, ‘I am scum of the earth’ or some other damaging attribute.  On that very first day, I received more Aha moments than I had hoped to receive throughout the entire retreat. I felt this was a turning point in my life, and this was only day one.

The Two Evaluations:
Ego Evaluation:Another deep eye opener was when Regina asked us to interview the ego as the observer and ask ‘what it thought about each one of us’. I had never heard of that exercise before so I was a little skeptical that anything helpful could come out of it for me. Boy was I wrong! When I asked the question as the observer ‘what do you think about Francine, there was no hesitation…the ego blasted ‘Francine is boring.’ It became crystal clear to me that this perception had been running below the surface and affecting my life in many ways. When I shared the ego’s perception of me with the group, Regina’s and Jacquelyn’s expressions was worth a thousand words… They totally did not view me as boring. I replied, ‘how can you not see that I’m the most boring person on the planet?  The others in the group also did not share my perception of myself but since I have known Jacquelyn and Regina for a few years, there response to how I perceived myself was VERY impactful. Although I had been aware of this perception in my head, it felt like a new discovery. Again, this was huge for me. How could I have been so wrong about my perception of myself! I was beginning to gain more clarity on how believing ego thoughts is a complete lie and extremely damaging.

Holy Spirit’s Evaluation:Then we contemplated Holy Spirit’s assessment of me:  “You shine radiant with bliss, with peace, with sweetness and purity” by Yoga Vasistha. What a contrast between the ego’s and the Holy Spirit’s perception! How loving, how beautiful, how freeing it would be to know in my heart that Holy Spirit’s perception of me is the truth! I could feel the truth of it but I have a lot of work to do to cement it. This is a big one for me to work on, but it is also very exciting. So much resistance has falling away – at least for now.

Root Cause Inquiry:We had another exercise of journaling about our most disruptive ‘I am bad belief’.  The root cause revealed that ‘I am scum of the earth’, which is the root cause of many of my beliefs so that was not new. As I had experienced many times before, I felt stuck, and helpless to let it go so I asked Regina what to do. She told me to pray about it– Holy Spirit, how can I let go of this belief that I am ‘scum of the earth’? I’m willing to hear anything that you’ll share with me.’ It sounds so simple. Why didn’t I think of this myself? The ego hides our most helpful tools from us. I had a very healing contemplation of the ‘I am bad’ belief, and I feel more equipped to use prayer as a means to release my beliefs when I feel stuck.

Is Attack Possible?We talked about ‘Is attack possible’? The answer is No, attack is not possible. It’s all about what I am believing – never about truth. So when I am upset for any reason, ask ‘what am I believing about myself’? What I am believing is never the truth about myself so why be afraid to go there?Regina said to trust I am healing, trust the Holy Spirit is right and I am wrong about my feelings. Trust that I have never been bad. A belief says “I am right’, it’s a fact; trust it is wrong. At some point you’ll see you made this up. Trusting you’re wrong will carry you through it even if it’s not 100% trust.  Jacquelyn had a wonderful, very clear homily on this topic at the 8-18-19 gathering: “Believing is Seeing”. This trust and clarity I had during the retreat made root cause inquiry enjoyable because I knew I was letting go of being trapped.

There are countless gems we received during the retreat. I went home feeling so light, like a big weight had been lifted. That feeling of being light weight has dimmed but one thing is for sure, I remember the sharing, and the ‘Aha moments, and I continue to feel optimistic that I can let go of the ‘I am bad belief’.  We were reminded of so many tools: Rest, Accept and Trust and self-coaching when the mind goes crazy, and journaling when the ego hides our beliefs. Regina shared examples from her journal, as well as handouts about many teachings she received from Spirit.

If it weren’t for the shared retreat with my Awakening-Together friends, I would not have received the experience and clarity about how flawed my thinking is. It was absolutely necessary for me to attend this retreat, and I am so grateful I did. Now I really have something to work with. The tools are more obvious and there is less resistance. Yippee!

I’m also grateful for our great cook, Shiryl Kaplan who is always so welcoming. She has a genuine interest in each one of us and goes out of her way to be helpful.

Thank you Regina and everyone for making this retreat such a success for me.

Love to All,
Francine

Filed Under: AT Blog Articles, Sidebar

Gentle Healing Year 3 ~ Daily Contemplation #214

September 7, 2019 By Regina Dawn Akers

Please read and contemplate quote #696 in The Seven Steps to Awakening with your inner teacher. Here is a portion of that quote:

O mind, when you cease to be, all the good and noble qualities blossom. There is peace and purity of heart. People do not fall into doubt and error. There is friendship which promotes the happiness of all.

Note: The next Daily Contemplation will be available tomorrow morning after 2am ET at this link.

Filed Under: Daily Contemplation, GentleHealingTips-Year3, Sidebar

Gentle Healing Year 1 ~ Lesson 199

September 7, 2019 By Jacquelyn Eckert

LESSON 199. I am not a body. I am free.

Our current goals:
  • Widen the horizons of our vision
  • Take direct approaches to uncover the blocks that keep our vision narrow
  • Lift those blocks, however briefly, in order to experience the sense of liberation that comes when the blocks are removed
  • Intensify our motivation for freedom

We are Awareness-life-presence. We are not bodies. “Freedom must be impossible as long as you perceive a body as yourself. The body is a limit. Who would seek for freedom in a body looks for it where it can not be found.”

We are being asked here to see the false as false—the temporary as temporary. As with forgiveness, the body is another illusion that can be used to let go of all illusion.  Indeed, the lesson states, “Declare your innocence and you are free. The body disappears, because you have no need of it except the need the Holy Spirit sees. For this, the body will appear as useful form for what the mind must do. It thus becomes a vehicle which helps forgiveness be extended to the all-inclusive goal that it must reach, according to God’s plan.”

In order to surrender this illusion to the service of Holy Spirit or Awareness, we must surrender our beliefs about the body. Because we seem to have an experience of the body, we believe that we are contained within it. Indeed, in order to have any other tactile or visceral experience, we feel that “within” our bodies. All of the bodily sensations we experience, however, we, ourselves, place within the body. It is similar to the phantom limb syndrome experienced by amputees—their mind tells them they are experiencing a sensation in the missing limb, which is of course, impossible.

NTI Philippians, Chapter 2 says this of the body: “Do not be personal with the body as you watch it and observe it. Do not feel that you are looking at you. I tell you, the body that you observe is not you. It is merely an expression of your thought. You are the process of creation that is God. You are mind and spirit that is not in the world. Separate yourself from the body in order to observe it. Observe it in order to learn what you want to learn about yourself.”

We are asked by this lesson to wear the body lightly—to be willing to give this illusion up as all the others. The lesson states very clearly that the body is a limit. It is because we believe the body is “me,” that we value it so highly.

We can consciously choose to watch the body but to dis-identify with it in the same way we are learning to dis-identify with thought. Thoughts seem to appear within our awareness, yet we are coming to see we are not the thoughts. In the same way, recognize that the body seems to appear within your awareness, but you are not your body. Watch your body in the same way that you watch your thoughts. It is the thoughts to which the body responds. Learn this connection in order that it be undone.

When the body tells you that it is tired, for example, do you always find this to actually be true? I often lay down to sleep, sleepy, and find I can’t sleep. When the body gives you directives, see if you are able to at least delay them—don’t immediately move to comfort the body.

We are being asked not to value the valueless. We are asked to give up our fascination with the body and focus our attention on the truth of our nature—on awareness-life-presence. “The mind (Awareness) that serves the Holy Spirit is unlimited forever, in all ways, beyond the laws of time and space, unbound by any preconceptions, and with strength and power to do whatever it is asked.”

When we accept awareness as our identity, we become the observer of everything that appears including the body. We abide as our Self while temporary appearances come and go. We do not give undue meaning or value to anything that does not last.

“I am not a body. I am free. I hear the Voice that God has given me, and it is only this my mind obeys.”

Filed Under: JPE GH Tips, Sidebar

Gentle Healing Year 3 ~ Daily Contemplation #213

September 6, 2019 By Regina Dawn Akers

Please read and contemplate quotes #693-695 in The Seven Steps to Awakening with your inner teacher. Here is the last quote:

Thoughts are utterly useless, now that the mind is dead.

Note: The next Daily Contemplation will be available tomorrow morning after 2am ET at this link.

Filed Under: Daily Contemplation, GentleHealingTips-Year3, Sidebar

Gentle Healing Year 1 ~ Lesson 198

September 6, 2019 By Jacquelyn Eckert

Lesson 198. Only my condemnation injures me.

Our current goals:
  • Widen the horizons of our vision
  • Take direct approaches to uncover the blocks that keep our vision narrow
  • Lift those blocks, however briefly, in order to experience the sense of liberation that comes when the blocks are removed
  • Intensify our motivation for freedom

Today’s lesson makes clear that illusions are used to undo illusions, because truth has not been touched by illusions at all. This is why we are doing two things at once: We are practicing the teachings of A Course in Miracles Workbook for Students and practicing awareness-watching-awareness meditation.

Our work with A Course in Miracles is learning about and practicing the illusions that undo illusions. Let’s not get confused about this. Many students have become lost, because they have adopted the Course’s thought system as the truth. It isn’t the truth. It is an illusion that can be used to undo illusions.

Our second practice, awareness-watching-awareness, is the practice of paying attention to truth, which remains untouched by illusions.

Because we believe in personhood, we deny our wholeness and we believe in the illusion of loneliness. At the same time, we seek for wholeness. Since we are no longer see ourselves as whole, we combat the feeling of loneliness by joining groups with seemingly common interests and common values. These groups seem opposed to others that have congregated around their own interests and common values. The illusions just keep building on each other. Those groups may not support me and my like minded friends. They may seem to condemn, attack and even injure me and my group. But, condemnation and attack and the injury caused by them are at the level of body and mind. In truth they do not occur and have no effects.

Our lesson today says, “Injury is impossible. And yet illusion makes illusion. If you can condemn you can be injured. For you have believed that you can injure, and the right you have established for yourself can be now used against you, till you lay it down as valueless, unwanted and unreal. Then does illusion cease to have effects, and all it seemed to have will be undone.”

Illusions like condemnation, attack, injury, personhood and loneliness are all one in the same. To the degree that we are caught up in them, we are identified with illusions as what we are. All illusions have equal power to keep us lost and ignorant of our truth. This is why forgiveness is justified regardless of what the illusion is. There are no special circumstances that validate condemnation of one another.

Forgiveness being an illusion, undoes illusions. Forgiveness is the one helpful illusion where we step back and see it is all illusion. Today’s lesson refers to forgiveness as the illusion that is the answer to the rest. Forgiveness is letting go of thought! It is removing value, belief and attention from thought.

We justify our condemnation and attacks unless we are vigilant for forgiveness. Today’s lesson says, “And why would you oppose [forgiveness], quarrel with it, seek to find a thousand ways in which it must be wrong, a thousand other possibilities? Is it not wiser to be glad you hold the answer to your problems in your hand?”

Forgiveness’ purpose is undoing and unlearning the illusions that keep us trapped within the illusion because we are valuing the illusion. As long as you believe illusions have value, you are caught at the level of illusions. So illusions must be used to undo illusions until they have no value to you. Then your attention will leave illusions completely and truth will be all that is left in your Awareness.

Filed Under: JPE GH Tips, Sidebar

This Sunday in the Sanctuary ~ September 8, 2019

September 5, 2019 By Dawn Fernandez

Join us at 10:15 am ET/ 7:15 am PT for our Weekly Gathering with Rev. Billy Sinitris

Topic: “Throw away the book.”

Description: It means so much when you think about it, but then it takes you beyond words. Billy will be talking about Peter and Paul, two giants of the New Testament and how they influenced millions from two different interpretations.

Reading: Lesson 186 in A Course in Miracles.

*Weekly gathering is held every Sunday morning at 10:15 am ET/7:15 am PT in the Awakening Together Sanctuary. Join us after the Gathering for our Fellowship Time, hosted by Rev. Jay McCormick.

 

Regina Dawn Akers Outside

Join us at 7:00 pm ET/ 4:00 pm PT for The Guiding Light with Rev. Regina Dawn Akers

This will be a previously recorded audio.

 

 

 


 

Join us at 8:00 pm ET/ 5:00 pm PT for Second Quarterly Member Meeting

Rev. Jacquelyn Eckert will be leading this member meeting. The agenda for this quarter’s meeting is: Financial Update, New Forum Policy, Reflections from the Retreat House, the Awakening Together Fall Retreat, and the 2020 Retreats at the Retreat House.

 


 

Join us at 9:00 pm ET/ 6:00 pm PT for Fully Human Fully Divine Satsang with Craig Holliday

Craig Holliday continues his examination of what it means to be both free and human.

Filed Under: AT News, Sidebar

Gentle Healing Year 3 ~ Daily Contemplation #212

September 5, 2019 By Regina Dawn Akers

Please read and contemplate quotes #690-692 in The Seven Steps to Awakening with your inner teacher. Here is the last quote:

You do not exist, O mind.

Note: The next Daily Contemplation will be available tomorrow morning after 2am ET at this link.

Filed Under: Daily Contemplation, GentleHealingTips-Year3, Sidebar

Gentle Healing Year 1 ~ Lesson 197

September 5, 2019 By Jacquelyn Eckert

Lesson 197. It can be but my gratitude I earn.*

Our current goals:
  • Widen the horizons of our vision
  • Take direct approaches to uncover the blocks that keep our vision narrow
  • Lift those blocks, however briefly, in order to experience the sense of liberation that comes when the blocks are removed
  • Intensify our motivation for freedom

Today’s lesson is quite profound. Inner Wisdom certainly had in mind for me to learn it. I read it early in the morning the day this tip was written and I would like to share my experience regarding the lesson with you. In order to do so, I must give you some details of my day.

One of the things I did today was prepare the Trustee Board Meeting Agenda. As part of our trustee meetings, we contemplate a quote chosen by Regina or myself, depending on which of us is leading the meeting. I felt drawn to a quote by J. Krishnamurti. It was a quote I had mentioned in Gentle Healing during our last session—“I don’t mind what happens.” In looking to ensure it was he who actually said it, I came to review several quotes from him on Wikiquotes. One of these came to mind (as you will see below) as I prepared this tip.

My son kept coming to mind all day. I called him this evening and we had a lovely chat. He told me of an acquaintance who was going through some very difficult times. I told him of an acquaintance of mine who was also having a difficult go of things. I told my son—“There is a lot of suffering in the world. At the very least, these things should make us grateful for our own circumstances in life.”

Shortly after the call, I sat down to read the lesson again. Here is the first paragraph of today’s lesson:

“Gratitude is a lesson hard to learn for those who look upon the world amiss. The most that they can do is see themselves as better off than others. And they try to be content because another seems to suffer more than they. How pitiful and deprecating are such thoughts! For who has cause for thanks while others have less cause? And who could suffer less because he sees another suffer more? Your gratitude is due to Him alone Who made all cause of sorrow disappear throughout the world.”

Wow! Could the message be any more on point? I read on. The lesson states: “Love makes no comparisons. And gratitude can only be sincere if it be joined to love. We offer thanks to God our Father that in us all things will find their freedom. It will never be that some are loosed while others still are bound. For who can bargain in the name of love?”

As I continued to read, I realized that this was the lesson that I discussed with a fellow Awakening Together member at the end of a phone call yesterday. He had seen something in the lesson and wanted to share it with me.

“We have been given everything. If we refuse to recognize it, we are not entitled therefore to our bitterness, and to a self-perception which regards us in a place of merciless pursuit, where we are badgered ceaselessly, and pushed about without a thought or care for us or for our future. Gratitude becomes the single thought we substitute for these insane perceptions. God has cared for us, and calls us Son. Can there be more than this?”

He shared his understanding that without having been given everything, we wouldn’t have the privilege of choosing to be bitter. Thus, he realized he could be grateful for his bitterness.

When I looked at the lesson this evening, I was amazed to see so many of these pieces come together around this lesson. I asked Inner Wisdom to share with me what I should share regarding this lesson. This is what came:

‘Blessings to you in your amazement! Haha. You are that which is loved and that which is love. You are that which extends. You are that which is.

This is the source and the cause of your gratitude. You are not unfamiliar with gratitude. You, yourself have shared that when you are quiet—when you be still—it is gratitude that you find. You found it odd to “characterize” it as such. It is not so odd.

What is the response to the all in all but gratitude? There is never any thing to be grateful for. As J. Krishnamurti said:

Passion is something which very few of us have really felt. What we may have felt is enthusiasm, which is being caught up in an emotional state over something. Our passion is for something: for music, for painting, for literature, for a country, for a woman or a man; it is always the effect of a cause. When you fall in love with someone, you are in a great state of emotion, which is the effect of that particular cause; and what I am talking about is passion without a cause. It is to be passionate about everything, not just about something, whereas most of us are passionate about a particular person or thing. I think one must see this distinction very clearly. In the state of passion without a cause, there is intensity free of all attachment; but when passion has a cause, there is attachment, and attachment is the beginning of sorrow.

Vol. XIII, p. 251

[Note that in the quote Krishnamurti speaks of “passion,” but he could just as easily have used the word “gratitude.”]

It is all causeless. The very idea of time is premised on your notions of cause and effect. Remember means and end are the same. Remember that, that which you would experience must be that which you supply. You cannot continue to think in terms linear and appreciate the nature of your Self.

You are that. Give to each other as if you know that. Give thanks for everything and nothing.’

As our lesson tells us, “We thank our Father for one thing alone; that we are separate from no living thing, and therefore one with Him. And we rejoice that no exceptions ever can be made which would reduce our wholeness, nor impair or change our function to complete the One Who is Himself completion. We give thanks for every living thing, for otherwise we offer thanks for nothing, and we fail to recognize the gifts of God to us.”

Let us then be grateful for everything by learning to see all things as “the gifts of God to us,” for surely they are that. Specifically, let’s use gratitude today to strengthen our spiritual resolve. Let’s have gratitude for everything that reminds us of our spiritual purpose and gratitude for every opportunity to practice our spiritual purpose. This is the way to remember our True Self.

*PLEASE NOTE: A friend informed me this morning that my tip was actually about Lesson 195, Love is the way I walk in gratitude. This happenstance confirms for me the perfection (and the sense of humor) of the “all in all.” If you would like to see Regina’s tip for today’s Lesson 197, It can be but my gratitude I earn, click here.

Filed Under: JPE GH Tips, Sidebar

9/4/19 ~ Regina & ‘I Am That’ – It is All Consciousness

September 5, 2019 By Regina Dawn Akers

Regina Dawn Akers shared from the December 8, 1980 conversation in Consciousness and the Absolute.

Listen to this audio

Filed Under: RDA-IAmThat, Sidebar

Introducing “Something Genuine,” Sundays at 6 pm ET

September 4, 2019 By Jacquelyn Eckert

Join us for a new program called: SOMETHING GENUINE.

If you have ever watched a Ted talk on YouTube, you will appreciate their unique format and content. Speakers at TED events have a maximum of 18 minutes to share their messages, which are delivered in highly polished, succinct speeches. These talks are often humorous, poignant and informative. In this program, we will watch and discuss TED talks that reveal the Truth of ourselves and our universe based on the actual experience of ordinary people. Their insights are genuine—not based upon theory or dogma—and give us a “man on the street” perspective on what we are coming to learn through Awakening Together. We expect this to be a fun and illuminating program.

Plan to join us for this program on Sundays, 6-7 pm ET, beginning September 8.

Also, feel free to suggest TED talks for the program. Send suggestions to: Jacquelyn.AwakeningTogether@yahoo.com.

Filed Under: AT News, Sidebar

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