The primary theme in today’s reading is this:

Our thinking is not who we are;
therefore, it cannot lead us to know what we are.

We have learned to trust our thinking, which is one of the most foolish lessons we’ve ever learned. In fact, the three most foolish lessons we have ever learned are:

1. I am a self
2. I am this self (body-mind-personality)
3. I am a bad/lacking self

When you look at those three lessons, you see everything that we need to unlearn.

Of course, the self that believes these ideas cannot heal us of these ideas. That is why we need to learn to trust the guidance that comes from within, which may sometimes seem contrary to our will. What we perceive as ‘our will’ is based primarily on the last two lessons in the list above. What we perceive as ‘our will’ is a defense against the belief that we are bad or lacking, and it upholds the idea that we are a specific body-mind-personality. What we perceive as ‘our will’ is the obstacle to realizing our truth.

That’s why today’s reading says, “Do not ask for what you want. Ask Me what it is that you need, and I shall lead you to it.”

When we ask for specific things or circumstances that we want, those specific things are based on the fears and desires of the specific bad or lacking self that we think we are. Therefore, believing we need or want those things reinforces the idea that we are that self. By letting go of what we think we want, and by asking in trust for whatever it is that we need, we loosen our grip on who we think we are.

Today’s reading says, “Do not be confused. Your will is not the same as God’s, but when you lay your will aside and walk with God, you will know that you are one with Him.”

A common confusion is this idea: I am one with God, so what I want for myself is also what God wants for me. However, that confusion ignores the fact that you are confused about what you are. God is not confused about what you are. God’s Will is that you know your truth. That’s why you have been called from within to awaken. That’s why you are on this spiritual path. However, most of what you think you want still comes from mistaken ideas about who you are.

You are one with God. That is what God wants you to know—that is what awakening is—but that is not learned by reinforcing that you are the person you think you are. God’s Will is different from your will. Your will is based on mistaken ideas about who you are, and your will reinforces those ideas. God’s Will is the truth of what you are.

The reading asks us to let go of “old habits and old ways of thinking.” We can start by doing these two things:

1. Practice letting go of judgments as taught in yesterday’s tip.
2. Ask for what we need instead of asking for what we want. We can practice with the daily thought. When we contemplate the thought we can ask, “What would You have me see or realize from today’s thought,” and then see what unfolds from asking that question.

We cannot practice kindness if we continue to judge others. Every time we are not kind, it is because of judgment.

Today’s reading begins with a strong statement. It says, “Judgment is like a knife that cuts the Son of God [consciousness] into pieces, for what you judge as separate from you is seen as separate, and so it cannot be seen as one.”

That means if we want to awaken to unity-consciousness, we need to let go of judgment.

How do we let go of judging others? It is as simple as remembering what you truly want over and over and over again. The process looks like this:

1. A judgment comes into the mind. If you see the judgment with awareness, you can choose not to believe it right then, and this process is over. If you are lost in thinking and believe the judgment, you will experience an emotional effect. It could be a slight annoyance, outright anger, fear or any other effect.
2. The emotional effect can be like an alarm clock for you. You were not aware when you believed the judgment; the emotional effect can wake you up so that you return to awareness. As you become more practiced, the emotional effect will wake you up immediately. In the beginning, you may live with an emotion for a long time before you finally allow it to wake you up and bring you back to awareness.
3. When you become aware of the emotion, be grateful you’ve become aware, and then look at the mind to see what the judgment is. The judgment is present in the mind whenever the emotion is present, because there is a simultaneous cause and effect relationship between the judgment and the emotion.
4. See the judgment, and then ask yourself if you would rather hold onto this judgment (like a knife) or if you would rather know unity consciousness as a direct experience. Really look at what is most important to you.
5. Once you are in touch with your desire to know unity consciousness, make a decision to release the judgment. I whisper my decision to myself in the mind. I say, “I take it back.” That means, I take back believing this judgment. I’m not interested in it. I am more interested in truth.

Practice this process over and over and over and over again, each time you discover you’ve believed another judgment about someone. You can also practice it with judgments you believe about yourself or anything else. With time, you will see fewer judgments in your mind. It will also get easier to let go of judgments as soon as they appear in the mind, so that the process ends at step #1 and an emotional effect never occurs.

Consistent practice is the key to transcending judgment. It takes a lot of determination—a lot of “I really want to do this’’—but it can be done. You are allowed to change your mind. Remember this hint: It’s easier to let go of a judgment when you are in touch with what you really want.

When a judgment feels stuck—meaning you’ve tried, but you can’t let it go—look at the situation more deeply using Root Cause Inquiry, Byron Katie’s ‘The Work’ or some other form of inquiry. There is more to be seen; there is a deeper belief that is being triggered by the situation. Use inquiry to find the belief, and then use the process from this tip to change your mind about it.

I recommend printing this tip so you can reference it repeatedly until the process above is a new habit. You will have to change your mind many times in order to change the mind. That’s because you are reprogramming the brain. The brain wasn’t programmed with just one thought one time. It was programmed through habitual thinking. A new habit of thought—the process taught in this tip—will reprogram it.

We have a practical goal, which is kindness. We will practice kindness to the best of our ability. However, we are not practicing kindness merely for kindness’ sake. We are on a journey toward truth. Kindness is a step in that direction.

NTI says, “If you are to walk the path of righteousness, all things must be done for the reason of the Heart. … Let not actions blind you. It is not the action that matters, but the purpose that is given it.” In other words, if truth is what we seek, then truth must be the reason for our kindness.

Let me give you an example of a common mistake in purpose. Some people will read this teaching or a teaching like it, and then do their best to be kind so they can be good. The purpose of being good is different than seeking truth. If one’s underlying goal is to be good, one has selected a goal that has an opposite. The goal and its opposite are one, since you can’t have one without the other. That means that anyone who wants to see herself as good will also see herself as bad.

Truth has no opposite. By making truth realization your reason for kindness, you set yourself on a path of increasing clarity.

Today’s reading shares tips about how to practice kindness for the purpose of truth realization. In short, it guides us to:

1. Ask for what we want in a heartfelt, prayerful way.
2. Remember our purpose—truth realization—in all things.
3. Surrender to inner guidance. Trust it and follow it in all things without seeking a specific outcome for the self.

There are two comments I’d like to make about today’s reading:

First, today’s reading refers to our “evil thoughts that would trick and blind us to the Light within.” Some people don’t like the word “evil,” probably because they associate it with guilt. As I mentioned in my first tip this year, guilt does not come from the conscience. The conscience is non-judgmental wisdom. Any sense of guilt comes from the mind’s interpretation of you in relationship to your conscience.

One definition of “evil” is “something which is harmful or undesirable.” In other words, evil, as it is used in NTI, is a term of discernment instead of judgment. “Evil thoughts” refers to thoughts that hurt us rather than awaken us. Since we don’t want to be hurt, and we do want to awaken, it serves us well to recognize those thoughts and let them go. Conscience will help us do that, since conscience is our inner knowing.

Secondly, today’s reading makes a comment that I’d like to highlight. It says, “But if you do not trust your Heart [conscience and spiritual intuition] and you try to find your own way to happiness, you shall be lost.”

We have a longtime habit of self-centeredness to the point that we think we want to be self-centered. Therefore, when conscience or spiritual intuition guides us to drop self-centeredness, we can feel threatened.

If you ignore conscience or spiritual intuition because you believe it is threatening, you will not transcend self-centeredness.

Knowing what you want is key. Know what you want, and then make decisions based on what you want. Even if you feel threatened or afraid, keep walking in the direction of what you really want. That is the only way to get there.

Most people do not live according to their conscience, and so the conscience has been repressed. Since the conscience is repressed in most humans, humanity had to create laws, moral codes, and etcetera to tell people how to behave. In order to enforce these laws, humanity also created consequences for breaking its laws. Of course, these consequences have often been extreme and just as out of harmony with conscience as the crime itself.

Ego is responsible for the repression of conscience. When we believe our egotistical self-centered thoughts, we ignore conscience. Since conscience is not self-centered, we believe it is against our will, which is self-centeredness. In other words, we literally choose self-centeredness over unity.

Practicing kindness in our relationships with others reverses this process.

Today’s reading provides guidance about how to practice kindness, which it calls love. It also addresses some common confusion about this practice. I encourage you to read slowly and digest this guidance.

Many spiritual people ignore the guidance for kindness. Sometimes they use excuses to justify unkindness like, “the world is not real,” “the script is written,” “I am not the doer,” “there are no others,” or “I’m just a mirror of your state of mind.” Two traveling spiritual friends of mine used to steal from people who invited them into their homes. They claimed that by stealing, they gave their hosts the opportunity to forgive. They even coined a term for it: stealing for forgiveness.

Self-centeredness is what repressed conscience in the first place, and self-centeredness will confuse spiritual teachings in order to keep it repressed, if you let it. However, that’s not necessary, because you do have conscience.

Conscience comes from the latin verb, conscire. “Con” means “with,” and “scire” means “know.” Therefore, conscience literally means ‘with knowing.’ Since this knowing is built into you, you can know when confusion is trying to confuse you; you can know when you are trying to ignore conscience; you can know when you are attempting to justify being out-of-harmony with conscience; and you can know how to be in harmony with conscience. It’s all a matter of wanting to choose unity consciousness over separation (self-centered) consciousness.

This is a song that a friend wrote based on NTI Matthew, Chapter 5. It might be fun to listen to it as you contemplate your choice regarding kindness.

Rise Up by Esther Danmeri

In the story that I shared from the Bible yesterday, the Son of God submitted to a baptism by John the Baptist, a symbol of our conscience. When John said, “I need to be baptized by you,” John indicated that spiritual intuition is higher than conscience. However, when Jesus replied, “Let it be so now; it is proper for us to do this to fulfill all righteousness,” Jesus indicated that conscience has its place in the totality of wisdom. Conscience is to be respected and followed. It is not to be ignored as less than higher wisdom.

NTI begins on that premise. We begin by following conscience instead of ignoring it, and it is through following conscience that higher spiritual wisdom arises into conscious awareness.

Michael Langford concludes his book, Manonasa: A Spiritual Autobiography, with “Five Steps for the Majority.” These steps encourage us to follow our conscience in relationship with others. Here is what Michael wrote in Manonasa:

For those of you who do not want to attain Manonasa but you would like to know how you can move from darkness to light, follow all 5 steps on this page every day. All of you who do want to attain Manonasa should also follow the suggestions on this page, because these suggestions are for all of the more than 6 billion humans on earth:

1. Every time you speak to a human being either in person or over the phone, make sure the content of what you are saying and the tone of your voice are loving, caring, and kind.
2. Every time you write something to a human being, make sure that what you are writing is loving and kind. Pause before you send someone an email or a text message and make sure that your email or text message is loving, caring and kind.
3. Never do any harm of any kind to any human being or animal.
4. Treat even the people who you think do not deserve your kindness with kindness.
5. Treat even people you only see briefly with great caring and kindness.

When Peace Pilgrim began her spiritual investigation, she noticed that nearly every spiritual culture had a rule similar to “the golden rule.” Jesus taught this rule in the Bible by saying, “So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets.”

In Jesus’ final teaching to the apostles, just prior to his arrest and crucifixion, he said, “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.” (John 13:34, 35)

Kindness with one another and with all living things (ahimsa) is where we begin our second year of Gentle Healing. When we practice kindness, our goal isn’t to act kind on the outside while judging and carrying on ferociously in our minds (although that may be how it starts). Kindness is a way of being that we want to master through and through. In this way, kindness is a purification technique.

First, we behave kindly with everyone, because to not be kind is to be a slave to the ego, and we don’t want that. Then secondly, if we do not feel kind within, we question our thoughts and feelings. We turn to inquiry and to rest-accept-trust in order to heal every part of us that is not naturally kind.

NTI says, “… the law of the heart is beyond the world. It is like a path that you shall follow to higher ground.”

In other words, as we live by conscience in our relationships with others, it leads to higher and higher levels of wisdom, levels that “lead a man from his manhood to his true Self…”