What is the Ego?

Our special theme says, “To know reality is not to see the ego and it thoughts, its works, its acts, its laws and its beliefs, its dreams, its hopes, its plans for its salvation, and the cost belief in them entails. In suffering, the price for faith in it is so immense that crucifixion of the Son of God is offered daily at its darkened shrine, and blood must flow before the altar where its sickly followers prepare to die.”

Ew. That’s not a very pretty description.

Yet, that is a reasonable description of the ego, although it is one the ego wants us to deny.

Let review a few things Michael Langford has to say about the ego in The Most Direct Means to Eternal Bliss:

For thousands of years humans have been stuck in the same pool of inward unsolved problems. Thousands of years ago humans had the problems of suffering, sorrow, anger, fear, violence, conning, cheating, lying, death, etc. Today humans have the problems of suffering, sorrow, anger, fear, violence, conning, cheating, lying, death, etc. All of these problems have a single cause.

The ego controls thinking and the ego does not like to be exposed.

The ego is thought. The ego is thinking.

Living from thought instead of living from Awareness is the cause of all human suffering.

The ego is the cause of all disease, death, war, fear, anger and violence.

All humans are slaves and the imposter “self” is their master.

Here’s a Christmas song by John Lennon that helps expose how “living from thought instead of living from Awareness” manifests itself: (Note: This tip continues below the video.)

It’s okay. A new year of Gentle Healing is about to begin. We can do something to help heal the world, if we want.

Forgiveness lets me know that minds are joined.

Our lesson says, “Forgiveness is the means appointed for perception’s ending. Knowledge is restored after perception first is changed, and then gives way entirely to what remains forever past its highest reach.”

Today, let’s contemplate our desire to free the world of its suffering by letting go of the cause of suffering in our own minds.

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What is the Ego?

Our special theme says, “The ego is insane.” It also says, “The Son of God is egoless.”

What am I?

The correct answer would be “the egoless Son of God,” but is that my actual experience?

Am I free of all sorrow and suffering? Do I live in eternal joy? Is my experience absolutely free of fear and guilt? Do I see only peace surrounding me? Is my experience that of the deepest silence and tranquility?

If not, then I do not know myself as the egoless Son of God. And if I would like to know my egoless Self, I have some work to do to undo illusions in my mind.

I choose to see my brother’s sinlessness.

Our lesson begins by saying, “Forgiveness is a choice.” However, it continues by saying, “I never see my brother as he is, for that is far beyond perception.”

I think Course students sometimes feel that if they let go of the current judgment in their mind, they have let go of seeing their brother with ego, and they are now seeing him and accepting him as he is. However, our workbook lesson says that our brother, as he is, is far beyond perception. That means that as long as we perceive a world and bodies, we do not know our brother. If we do not know our brother, we also do not know our Self.

A Course in Miracles points far beyond simply being kind to others, although being kind to everyone is a very good start. A Course in Miracles points to full awakening, manonasa, as the way to see and know everything as it is.

Sister Bernadette Roberts described creation beyond the world and beyond consciousness as “eternal form.” She wrote, “Beyond consciousness, the ultimate Truth of the divine is that it is neither immanent (within anything) nor transcendent (beyond anything), but IS everything that eternally exists.”

What eternally exists? Sister Bernadette is clear that it is not consciousness or matter as we perceive matter, but there is “eternal form that cannot be grasped by the senses, the intellect or consciousness.” Whatever that is, that is our brother as he is. That is also our true nature.

As you interact with others today, contemplate that you have no idea what this one’s “eternal form” is. You cannot see him/her as he/she is. You do not know anything as it is, not even yourself. Let this sink in as deeply as you can allow it to sink in. Don’t let the mind short-circuit your contemplation by saying, “He is light,” or “She is God.” Don’t be satisfied with mere concepts today. However, DO realize that ego is the obstacle that blocks true vision. It keeps you from seeing everyone and everything in its “eternal form.”

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What is the Ego?

Our special theme says, “The ego is insane,” and then continues to describe its insanity. What stands out to me in this paragraph is the statement:

In fear it stands beyond the Everywhere,
apart from All,
in separation from the Infinite.

I need to ask myself:

Do I want to continue to do that?

I feel this is a really important decision. I know I will either spend my time reinforcing the ego, or I will spend my time in the spiritual practice that undoes the ego and awakens to truth.

I also find this question showing up in my mind:

Do I love God enough to awaken to God?
Or are other things still more important?

Today I claim the gifts forgiveness gives.

Please read today’s workbook lesson in full as you contemplate the questions I have asked myself above.

You might also enjoy listening to this video by Michael Langford. The video is 21 minutes long. The meditation options are below the video.

 

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What is the Ego?

Our special theme says, “The ego is ‘proof’ that strength is weak and love is fearful, life is really death, what opposes God alone is true.”

In other words, the ego is “proof” that we are limited humans existing in a body in a world and destined to die.

What that means to me is that the ego is the source of doubt.

Do you ever experience doubt? Do you ever doubt that enlightenment is real? Do you ever doubt that eternal life is real? Do you ever doubt that you could awaken to truth beyond this world?

Fortunately, although we sometimes experience doubt, doubt isn’t all that is in our minds. There is also willingness; there may even be a longing to search for truth, possibly a longing so strong that it feels like a calling you can’t ignore.

Will we listen to the ego’s doubts and resign ourselves to the self and world that we are familiar with? Or will we follow our willingness, longing or calling, and engage in the spiritual practice that leads beyond the ego and its doubts?

How far are we willing to go in order to discover truth beyond the ego?

Forgiveness ends the dream of conflict here.

The prayer in today’s lesson says:

Father, forgiveness is the light You chose to shine away all conflict and all doubt, and light the way for our return to You. No light but this can end our evil dream. No light but this can save the world. For this alone will never fail in anything, being Your gift to Your beloved Son.

Forgiveness, as we have seen, is abiding as our unaffected Self. It’s often called being the observer or remaining in Presence.

Our lesson begins by saying, “Conflict must be resolved. It cannot be evaded, set aside, denied, disguised, seen somewhere else, called by another name, or hidden by deceit of any kind…”

What is the difference between abiding as the unaffected Self and falling for habits like evasion, setting aside, denying, etcetera?

How can we abide as the unaffected Self when we feel affected by something or someone?

Consider asking one of these questions, or a similar question, and writing to realize helpful clarity about abiding as the unaffected Self. Any clarity you receive will help, especially if you are going through the purification stage right now.

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What is the Ego?

Our new special theme begins by saying, “The ego is idolatry…”

We can stop right there. Already we have something to contemplate.

What is idolatry?

Idolatry is extreme admiration, love, or reverence for something or someone.

In order to turn this definition into helpful insight, let’s pause and look at the definition slowly and contemplatively:

Extreme admiration, love or reverence
for something or someone.

In our last special theme, we saw that Truth is the absence of consciousness. Now we see that ego is the extreme admiration, love or reverence for something or someone—that is, love for object rather than for absence.

Can you find that— extreme love for object rather than for absence—in you? Can you see that which is intently focused on “something or someone” instead of absence?

Close your eyes and look. What is interested in thought, sensations, sounds—anything but absence?

It may feel like ‘me.’ It may feel like a sense of what you are. It may feel like your very existence. But it is none of those things. What you have just discovered is the ego.

Ego is that which admires, loves and reveres some thing. Ego is that which keeps us engaged in outward focus.

Fear binds the world. Forgiveness sets it free.

Fear is defined as an unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is dangerous, likely to cause pain, or a threat.

When it comes to the ego, fear is actually the belief that the absence of someone or something is dangerous, likely to cause pain, or a threat.

Today’s lesson says,“ego makes illusions.” Another way of saying that is outward focus makes illusions. We could also say attachment to objects, including thoughts, makes illusions.

The lesson also says that “Truth undoes” these same illusions.

In our last special theme, we saw that truth is the opposite of illusions. That means it must also be the opposite of outward focus.

Of course, the opposite of outward focus is inward focus. It is through inward focus that we find Truth, of which our lessons says, “It merely is. And by its presence is the mind recalled from fantasies, awaking to the real. … Without forgiveness is the mind in chains, believing in its own futility.”

In our first special theme, we learned that forgiveness is abiding as the unaffected Self. That means that the ego is undone by turning inward and abiding there as the unaffected Self.

Please contemplate this tip. Notice the ego in you. See it in action. Also contemplate how ego is undone. And then with this clarity, enter into your meditation for today.

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Before we begin our new special theme, let’s take a day to review the special themes we’ve contemplated so far. I will begin “What is the Ego?” tomorrow.

What is Forgiveness? Forgiveness is recognizing yourself as the unaffected Self. Therefore, “what you thought your brother did to you has not occurred.”

What is Salvation? Salvation is healing by “failing to support the world of dreams … it lets illusions go. By not supporting them, it merely lets them quietly go down to dust.”

What is the World? It is a “false perception” where “mechanisms of illusion … go to find what has been given them to seek.” Yet, “all perception can be given a new purpose.”

What is Sin? Sin is ignorance or outward focus. “Sin is the home of all illusions, which but stand for things imagined issuing from thoughts that are untrue.”

What is the Body? “The body is a fence” that seems to separate us from everything else. It makes duality seem real and makes it seem as if we experience duality directly. However, its purpose can be changed.

What is Christ? Christ is consciousness. It is the process of creation and the unaffected witness of creation. It is what we are. It is our higher Self. (Note: There is a more ultimate reality beyond Christ, compared to which Christ is an illusion.)

What is the Holy Spirit? The Holy Spirit is a Judeo-Christian term for spiritual intuition, which issues forth from our Self as consciousness. Its sole purpose is to help us awaken to consciousness. Once this goal is accomplished, its purpose is done. (God takes the last step to awaken us beyond consciousness.)

What is the Real World? The real world is the world as it is seen from the perspective of consciousness. It is a world blessed by forgiven eyes, seen through true perception. The real world is still a dream, but it is a dream that reflects Truth. It prepares us for the next and final awakening.

What is the Second Coming? It is awakening to our Self as consciousness. From this awakening we see with true perception and experience the real world.

What is the Last Judgment? This is the awakening beyond consciousness into Nirvana. With this step, consciousness itself is seen to be untrue.

What is Creation? “Creation” is a term A Course in Miracles uses for reality. It is what is known after manonasa, the death of our sense of self as mind-consciousness. It is our true Self beyond any sense of self. It is our actual existence, often referred to as bliss or Nirvana.

There is no conflict, for my will is Yours.

Today’s lesson helps emphasize any decision we may have made to commit even more to the path of awakening. It says:

How foolish, Father, to believe Your Son could cause himself to suffer! Could he make a plan for his damnation, and be left without a certain way for his release? … How could I think that Love has left Itself? There is no will except the Will of Love. … Conflict is sleep, and peace is awakening. Death is illusion; life, eternal truth.”

And so today we begin again. We forgive ourselves for any past “failings” that we may perceive, and we contemplate what we really want.

Here’s a song that always inspires me whenever I make the decision to increase my commitment. (The Meditation Options are below the song.)

 

 
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What is Creation?

Step Five of The Seven Steps to Awakening by Michael Langford has this objective:

Be inspired, encouraged and motivated to:

1. Make and maintain the decision to bring the imposter self and all suffering to its final end and thus remain in infinite-awareness-love-bliss.
2. Actually practice…

Here are 21 quotes from Step Five to help motivate our decision. Please read these quotes slowly and contemplatively.

Ramana Maharshi:

Though in this false world one may live on, the ending of both “I” and “mine” in the clarity of true awareness, void of every doubt, this only is the abidance in the bliss of being That.

Returning to the source from which we have emerged, we are restored to our own true Being. Enjoying there bright and clear our natural bliss, still, still, unmoving we abide.

O mind, you wander far in search of bliss not knowing your natural state of Freedom. Your home of infinite bliss you will regain if only you go back the way you came.

A woman with a necklace round her neck imagines it is lost, and after long search elsewhere touches her own neck and there finds it; even so, the Self is here within. Probe for it there and find it.

Sri Annamalai Swami:

Don’t be discouraged by the length of the journey, and don’t slacken in your efforts to get home.

Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj:

Steady faith is stronger than destiny. Destiny is the result of causes, mostly accidental, and is therefore loosely woven. Confidence and good hope will overcome it easily.

You need maturity of heart and mind, which comes through earnest application in daily life of whatever little you have understood.

On your side there is so much trouble. On mine there is not trouble at all. Come to my side.

You are quite capable of crossing over. Only be sincere.

Faith is not blind. It is the willingness to try.

If only they go deeply into the fact of being and discover the vastness and the glory to which the ‘I am’ is the door, and cross the door and go beyond, their life will be full of happiness and light.

The Supreme Yoga

One should never yield to laziness, but strive to attain liberation, seeing that life is ebbing away every moment.

He who exerts seriously now is able to overcome predispositions and exalt himself from the states of darkness and stupidity and impurity.

The Self alone is to be sought, adored and meditated upon.

This Self is eternal existence.

The wayfarer does not despair at the sight of the long road ahead but takes one step at a time.

The man of Self-knowledge is awake to that which is non-existent to the ignorant. That which is real to the latter is non-existent to the enlightened.

One surely gains that for which one strives; if one neglects it he loses it. The mind flows along the course of wisdom or ignorance, in whichever direction you make it flow.

Sri Sankara

The Self is ever blissful and never experiences suffering.

By this discourse of teacher and pupil, the character of the Self is taught to those seeking Freedom, that they may be born to the joy of awakening.

Eternal, unfading, joy, unstained—this is the Eternal, THAT THOU ART.

I will not hurt myself again today.

Our workbook lesson begins, “Let us this day accept forgiveness as our only function.”

Our first special theme was, “What is forgiveness?” Through that special theme, we saw that forgiveness is abiding as the unaffected Self.

As today’s lesson says, “The Self which God created cannot sin, and therefore cannot suffer. Let us choose today that He be our Identity…”

Our fourth special theme was “What is Sin?” Through that special theme we saw that “sin” is ignorance or outward focus.

If you look carefully at the two sentences I have highlighted from today’s workbook lesson, you’ll see that the lesson is asking us to “go back the way you came.” That is, focus inward and return to our unaffected Self.

Here are two songs that you can listen to as you contemplate today’s lesson. The first song is directly applicable to the teaching today and over the last several days. The second song applies a bit more loosely, but it is a fun song that just might stick in your head. (The Meditation Options are posted below the songs.)

 

 
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What is Creation?

Our special theme says, “Our Father calls to us. We hear His Voice, and we forgive creation in the Name of its Creator, Holiness Itself…”

What does that mean, “forgive creation”?

What is God’s only true creation?

What is forgiveness?

Please contemplate these questions with inner spiritual wisdom until an answer that you know is true comes to you. It may be helpful to use writing to achieve that end. It is best to complete this contemplation on your own before reading the tip under today’s lesson.

Here is the music I am listening to as I contemplate this. Some of you might enjoy it too. Others will prefer silence.

Female voice

Male voices

I have already chosen what You will.

If there is any challenge forgiving yourself for having wandered from God’s genuine reality, today’s lesson may help with that challenge. It says, “Father, I thought I wandered from Your Will… Yet what I am in truth is but Your Will, extended and extending. This am I, and this will never change.”

Let’s not forget that our special theme over these last several days has been, “What is Creation?” And the answer is, “We are creation.”

In other words, in spite of this dream of consciousness, humanness and world, what we really are has continued unabated. That’s what awakening is all about. It’s awakening from what isn’t true to what is true.

Are you ready?

Please read today’s workbook lesson in full.
Thank you.

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What is Creation?

Our special theme says, “God’s memory is in our holy minds, which know their oneness and their unity with their Creator. Let our function be only to let this memory return, only to let God’s Will be done on earth, only to be restored to sanity, and to be but as God created us.”

That says it all. As we wind up the first year of Gentle Healing and prepare to begin the second year, we are asked to look at our commitment to truth, and to make our commitment whole.

We have looked at Choice A and Choice B in Chapter 5 of The Most Direct Means to Eternal Bliss a number of times now. Today, I’d like to share these same choices with you from the perspective of an awakened Carmelite Nun, Bernadette Roberts:

In contrast to the divine, the human condition is so terrible and devastating that even the worst of descriptions could never do it justice. I am not referring here to sin, evil or suffering, but rather to bare human existence itself—and the whole natural world included. What we usually think is so beautiful in this world is actually monstrous and unbearable to look at, but only in contrast to the divine. …

Those who believe man can have both heaven and this world at the same time are very much mistaken; such a notion is a total underestimation of God’s utter transcendence, … Compared to the divine estate there is no beauty or happiness in this world; thus man cannot afford to have a glimpse or taste of the final estate and still expect to find this world acceptable. The ultimate estate is not of this world; it is not even compatible with it… For this reason it is good that man does not see the reality of the divine beyond consciousness, for if he did he could not endure this world. What man does not know, he does not miss, and what he does not know is how utterly transcendent the divine really is.

That is her description of Choice B, living in the world as a self.

Here is her description of Choice A, which is Manonasa, awakening to the First Principle of God, Nirvana:

About all that can be said is that if we put together man’s loftiest experiences of ecstasy, bliss, love and all things ineffable, they fall as short of the divine condition as the size of an ant falls short of that of an elephant. Consciousness’ most lofty heavenly experiences of the divine are but the palest shadow of the ultimate divine condition or “heaven.”

It makes you wonder what we are choosing by not fully applying ourselves to awakening, doesn’t it?

I choose the second place to gain the first.

Our workbook lesson begins by saying, “What seems to be the second place is first, for all things we perceive are upside down until we listen to the Voice for God.”

I think Sister Bernadette made that perfectly clear with statements like, “What we usually think is so beautiful in this world is actually monstrous and unbearable to look at, but only in contrast to the divine.”

We put off seeking awakening with our whole heart, our whole soul, our whole mind and all of our strength, because of the things we value in this world. They get our time instead.

Could our sense of priorities be very, very wrong?

Is it time for a change?

Please read today’s workbook lesson in full, and contemplate it along with Bernadette’s description of the human condition compared to realization of the divine.

Also, reconsider your spiritual aspiration. Is it sufficient to give you the motivation you need to give even more to this spiritual path, or is there another spiritual aspiration that is more motivating for you? It may help to ask this question and write until the answer is realized. I did.

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What is Creation?

Our special theme says, “We are creation; … We seem to be discrete, and unaware of our eternal unity with Him. Yet back of all our doubts, past all our fears, there still is certainty. … God’s memory is in our holy minds…”

This is a very important clue. Truth is unimaginable, but it is reachable. And we reach it through a journey within our self.

This could be called returning in the way we came. We began at Home, in the First Principle of God as our Self. In this Self, however, there is no sense of self. There is awareness, but not awareness of. There is Truth without a subject to be aware of Truth.

From this state of Truth “in crept a tiny mad idea.” It could also be called a desire, a desire for something that did not exist. It was the desire to “Know thy Self,” which could be called a desire for a sense of self.

And so, a container that could have an experience of self arose. This container was a subject, something that could feel or know. It was awareness with the additional ability to be aware of. I call it consciousness in order to distinguish it from the awareness that it came from. This is the birth of the Second Principle of God.

Once consciousness arose, which is the ability to be aware of, there needed to be something to be aware of. Consciousness is like a living mirror that wanted something reflected in it, something to watch, know and feel. Of course, consciousness could have simply looked back in the direction it came from, and it would have experienced the reflection of Truth in itself. But consciousness was on an outward-bound journey, so it looked outward in its desire to know something as its self.

Out of this desire, divine law—the creative principle—arose, which is the Third Principle of God.

Through divine law, all of manifestation was born, which is the Fourth Principle of God.

As consciousness watched the images that appeared in it’s self, consciousness became engrossed with them. It began to identify with the images. Each of us, as consciousness, experiences an aspect of that identification. We feel identified with our thoughts, feelings, life experiences, etcetera, because we are the consciousness that has become identified with the images reflected in it.

So now, we begin the journey back in the way we came. It is an undoing. It is the return of a boomerang idea, going back inwardly by reversing the steps we took in the outward-bound direction.

First, there is the undoing of the distinct sense of self, typically called the ego. This is undoing of identification with the image as me. It is this sense of self that creates suffering. Therefore, this undoing is significant, but it is only part of the return journey.

When we awaken to our self as consciousness (the mirror), we experience a more correct sense of self. Whereas the idea that “I am the image” is a delusion for consciousness, the idea “I am consciousness” is more correct or truer. Yet, it is not ultimate truth, because the original true Self has no sense of self.

A sense of self is a type of existence. You could say, “I exist as the sense of what I am.” Since a sense of self is a type of existence, the end of the sense of self is a type of death. It is the death of what we have come to know as existence. The death of consciousness as self is manonasa. What lies beyond this death is Nirvana.

Note: Since consciousness is like a mirror, we can get a sense of Nirvana once we reawaken to consciousness. This sense comes from Truth’s reflection in the mirror of our self as consciousness. However, this sense is still only a sense received from a reflection. In order to know Truth directly, we must awaken fully to it and be it, which is to awaken beyond consciousness.

I need but call and You will answer me.

The reason for telling the story above is to help influence us to “constantly direct [mind-consciousness] toward liberation, through self-effort.” We made the outward journey through a kind of self-effort—idea, desire, curiosity, will, focus—and now we make the return journey through the same kind of self-effort.

But how? Where do we begin today?

Today’s workbook lesson says, “I am not asked to take salvation on the basis of an unsupported faith. For God has promised He will hear my call, and answer me Himself.”

The God that we call on for guidance is not some distant deity, knowledge or awareness. We are the one that took the outward journey from truth to our present attachment to manifestation, and every step of that journey is recorded in our divine unconscious. Therefore, the reverse of each step is known in our own divine unconscious. Our own unconscious knows the way! The communication that comes from this unconscious knowing is what I call spiritual intuition.

We literally have everything we need, except for maybe one thing. It’s possible that we haven’t actually made the decision to begin the return journey yet. It’s possible that we are still interested in lingering here a little longer.

Please read and contemplate today’s workbook lesson in full. As you do, also contemplate the power of your own decision or lack thereof. (In truth, there’s no such thing as a lack of decision. Not deciding for one option is deciding for the other.)

Here are a couple of short video clips to help you contemplate today’s teaching in a fun way. You’ll find the meditation links under the video clips.

 
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