The Willingness to Heal – Transcript of Chris Celine Satsang

Innocent creation. Accept that innocence is all that there is. How do you navigate that innocence is all that there is? If you wake up in the morning and you embrace that you are innocent, that you are the innocence of God, the innocence of Creation, what can follow for the day? To accept that you can see only innocence, that you can be only innocence and that only innocence exists. In that acceptance, where are you going to go after that? You’re certainly not going to turn the corner and say, “I don’t want that innocence, I want that misery instead”! That’s not going to happen more than likely. If it does, a deeper resistance is running. It would be more likely that you could start out with not remembering being the innocence and then embrace the innocence with acceptance.

But, why not start out the day with the declaration “I am the innocence of God. Only innocence exists. I don’t want to see anything else. I don’t want to know anything else because God has willed it to be so.” And with that comes a letting go. Surrender. No more protecting a false identity. Imagine that day you wake up and it comes to you “it seems like I fight hard to stay with what I know. But what I know is all made up in my mind. So now maybe I could actually surrender what I think I know and invite the knowledge of God.” Invite it. Embrace it. And speak to that knowledge of God. Speak and expect an answer. Commune with the Divine.

It’s the preciousness of the every moment. Let it take you to join in that communion. It’s too precious to be ignored. It’s too precious to skim over it. But in this moment, also, as the innocence of Creation, such a beautiful, deep letting go. Beautiful surrender…of all that you thought you were. Letting the Holy Spirit show you pictures, show you circumstances where you were mistaken, where you thought you were somebody, and you had an identity. Now it can be shown to you how you have lived…all of humanity have lived in a life of delusion of a separate self. And in surrender, it starts to fade. That false imagery starts to fade. And it’s the blessing of healing when it starts to fade. Because what takes its place is the Light. The Light that is within, the Light that is all around you. The Light that is the Truth of God.

Innocence of God. Imagine that you would accept in willingness that everyone was innocent? And in that premise of acceptance that everyone is innocent, that you would take that and see everyone in that innocence because you want to. So, what would that look like? It would look like you had a tennis racket and every thought that came up about what you thought you knew about somebody, you would hit it with your tennis racket and send it into the oblivion because it didn’t mean anything. You would send it like you would send a tennis ball.

An idea comes to you of how old somebody is or what their accomplishments are or what their accomplishments aren’t or what you think about them. And each thought just gets thrown up in the air and smacked with the tennis racket and sent over the bushes never to be heard from again. And as you send them, throw them into air, your heart sings “Go to God.” While you’re playing tennis with your thoughts, you begin to realize that without those thoughts you do see a different reality. Without those thoughts, Light begins to show up. It was always there, but wasn’t noticed because there were all these thoughts that were camouflaging Reality.

And you start to also notice that all of these perceived major and minor differences that seem to be in every body’s identity are fading away. You can’t really tell too much difference between one Beloved and another Beloved because they’re both innocent. They’re both the Light of God. They’re both perfect. They’re both One with you. And all three…you can’t find any difference anymore. And you begin to recognize what it is that God has been wanting you to find. The innocence that is waiting to be discovered with every Beloved. And when you look in the mirror, do you see a haircut or do you see the Light of God? You have an opinion about what you see in the mirror or does happiness come from your Heart? Because, the innocence of God is looking back at you.

The Miracles of Creation are always available for every element of your life. And how easy it is to allow that YES to lead the way. And in this moment YES of innocence, to the entire universe. This universe is all love, it is innocent. It is the innocence of Love itself. This Sanctuary is filled with the Love that is innocent, pure, and Holy. Can’t even be changed. Always the innocence. And in this moment, only innocence, no other thoughts. Love is this present moment. Love is all that there is. There is one existence…the life force of God. Everyone carries the life force of God within them. It’s the strength of Truth. And the weakness of the ego starts to disappear, starts to fade because the strength of God is being chosen.

I’m not weak, but strong in the Truth of Love.
I’m not helpless but all powerful, in the Truth of Love.

It’s where you hold your attention in the strength of Love.

I was called to sing a few hymns that were instrumental in healing for me. The beauty of these hymns, these particular hymns that I usually sing, is their uniqueness of how they manifested within the world. Every single one of them was brought by a Divine Being and brought through whoever it was that was the recipient of that hymn. The beloved was chosen, called to be the recipient. The hymn that was brought by a Divine Being was for the recipient, for a distinct way of paying attention to this particular hymn of healing that was pertinent to their own journey.

Not exclusive, but pertinent. The hymns that became powerful for me were not necessarily the hymns that I received, that I was called to bring through. Many of them came through the Master that had opened to the Divine Mother to allow these hymns to come through and to open the path of Love.

When you hear these hymns and you consider that these are coming from Divine Beings exclusively for the purpose of your healing…of anyone who hears them, of anyone who can take these teachings and live through the offering to allow them to influence your learning and that you learn from them because they’re powerful directions to the Divine.

This particular hymn…I wouldn’t know when this hymn was going to be sung because I didn’t have a very good grasp of numbers or sequences. So, this hymn is numbered 108. So, before this hymn would be sung, within the ritual there would be 107 sung before it, sometimes twice. So, sometimes it was 200 and…the energy was holding my attention so I couldn’t keep track of anything. But, every time this hymn was being sung, I would already be shaking. I would be shaking before it was sung, because the power of it was…such a deep call to me. Not knowing why, but just answering to that deep calling. And here’s the teaching.

I sing here on earth of the Love God brings to me
Forever, forever, forever, forever.
My Mother, who comes with me, who brings me the lessons
Forever, forever, forever to be a beloved of all.
Stepping away from all those who are not interested in remembering. And who don’t want or aren’t ready yet to listen.
And who have not realized that they’re not happy.
This is the home of the Divine that brings all joy,
All peace, all harmony
To all those who are ready to come home,
Here in this Truth of Love.

The purpose of this hymn, when I said forever, forever, forever, forever, this is the integral part of it. This is a declaration that forever, Para Sempre , forever I will be in devotion to the Divine. Forever I will be ready to listen to the Divine.

There is a fear that comes with forever, forever, forever, forever. With fear the ego says “no, no, I’m the decider of what is forever…not God, not the Divine Mother.” And there’s a fear of forever. And yet, we are forever the Light of God. And this temporary identity has nothing to do with the fullness of the forever to God. Para Sempre, forever I will follow, forever.

I Beg

I beg, I beg the Father, my Father
To bring me the Holy Light to illuminate my path. I ask for this help.
I ask the Blessed Mother
And I asked the Christ Light, the Redeemer,
To illuminate my path on the path of Love.
This path of Love is in my Heart.
I ask Jesus to lead the way, to show the way.
I beg for Light.
I beg to see the Way.
Only you can show us the Way,
As I forgive myself for having lived Without the awareness of Love
And the Truth of the Spiritual Identity. I beg.
Bring me the Holy Light to illuminate my path.

When I first began hearing these hymns, and I saw beloveds who were part of this path that were singing and humming all the time and studying all the time. They carried a book with them all the time, because they were so engrossed in the learning of spiritual Truth. And, that image always stayed with me of their devotion and their purpose. And it made it so much easier than…to carry these hymns to work every day, to carry the teachings in whatever way they came to fill my heart and fill my mind and be in that devotion with them. And, how beautiful that devotion sparked the YES within.

We Add To Ourselves or Detract

Every time you open your mouth
And let a sound out, you alert the prey. And who is not hunting
Because of some hunger?

What you seek may run in different ways.
Or people you know may begin to snarl within When they see you coming.

We add to ourselves or detract whenever we speak. We speak our words
And turn those words into an entity
And a magnetic field

Someone has to reckon with. [continued below]

Our words turn into a magnetic field that goes out. Imagine how many magnetic fields there are just on this street? With all these thoughts that are being transmitted. And what kind of magnetic field are you adding to? It’s seeing it from that different place that you all have so much power. You have the power of Truth. And, you also have the power of illusion. And whichever you choose is what you are contributing. Either Love or fear.

[continued]

I have found it is best to be on good terms With as much as one can,
Controlling the notes from the flute,
From the body that can rise to serve.

Yes, we add to ourselves or detract In some ways with each movement. I have increased my worth so much, A treasury I have become

That I hope you loot. [Hafiz]

Looting a Divine Being of their treasure is one way of remembering the Truth…of wanting it so deeply.

Willingness is such an integral part of the learning of Love. But sometimes, willingness is not seen really clearly…how powerful your willingness is, choice, willingness…that’s it. That’s all that you have to work with, is to choose between Truth, Love or the made up past. So, you’re always choosing one or the other. With willingness you prepare your mind for the willingness. With your intention, you prepare for God’s presence with your willingness because you’re willing or you’re not willing, depending on what you choose. But, in your willingness, you are actually preparing for the teachings that will be coming. That’s the beautiful element of willingness. It’s the same thing as choice, and it’s either being chosen all the time or not, depending on what you want. But to realize how much your willingness is essential…either opens the door or not. That’s how much power you have. To make that choice.

Only by recognizing that you want healing above all else does the door open. That you want healing. Not that you know how healing occurs. Not that you know what the healing should look like. Not that you are in charge of the situation. Just that you’re willing. That you want (above all else) healing. And in that above all else that you want healing is such a deep level of trust, because you’re basically saying to God, the Holy Spirit, “you have carte blanche. I’m not here to tell you what needs to be healed. I’m here to ask for your healing of what you see is in the way,” because the Holy Spirit, the Divine Beings, the Guides, they all have the awareness of what’s in the way. So when you bring your willingness, it’s a GO. It’s a green light. It’s what you’ve been waiting for.

“I’m willing to see this differently. I’m willing to follow. I’m willing to ask…what’s most helpful. I’m willing, most of all to see peace instead of what I’m seeing… all the willingness.” And, as the Divine says, only bring your willingness. The next line of that Holy invitation is “and please don’t do anything else.” Only bring your willingness. Leave the rest to the Divine.

It is not helpful that you do more.

Why is it not helpful to do more? You would think that the more the better. But what happens is that once you have the willingness, everything else is orchestrated. Everything else is Divinely orchestrated. The Divine is aware of every moment of your existence. There is nothing, there are no secret thoughts, there is nothing that you have held that hasn’t been in the awareness of Love and what is most helpful for your healing. That’s why healing is so perfect, because it is orchestrated by the knowledge of what is most helpful for you.

Often, what happens in healing is that from this place of being the recipient of healing, it’s very sloppy. Healing is sloppy, because the Holy Spirit/God doesn’t use linear for healing. The healing Light moves as it needs to move through your past and your framework of time and everything else. And the Holy Spirit is moving through it and using healing as it’s coming to what needs to be healed first, and second, and then…and it’s all perfectly orchestrated.

There is no way that I could have walked through healing with any kind of awareness of what needed to be healed. Every time the ego showed me the past, all I could see was this giant maze of dark complications that were so incredibly enmeshed that there was no way that I could have in any way gone into that maze. The ego keeps saying, “don’t go to healing. It’s just too difficult.” But the Holy Spirit just moves and weaves through all of that maze and has no complications at all, because the Holy Spirit is in complete knowledge of what it is that needs to be healed within you before the next piece can be healed.

If you decide that you know what it is that needs to be healed, you will not be happy because it won’t be able to be healed because there’s a rhythm and a flow that has to come through surrender. Imagine that you would be having an operation in the world, and you’re on the operating table, and you get up on your elbows and say “no wait, wait. I have an idea, I know how it needs to be done. I’m going to tell you how to work through this surgery.” Well, everybody would probably drop their tools and leave the room. But this is what the ego wants to do with healing. The ego wants to pretend that it’s part of the team, and yet, the whole time, the Holy Spirit is saying “just be willing. Just be willing. Feel your willingness. Bring that.” Because everything that the Holy Spirit is going to show you is not going to be “oh goody.” What the Holy Spirit brings out of the shadows is what you haven’t wanted to see, what you have been hiding from yourself…possibly. Everybody carries the same thing.

Peace and joy and light abide in me.

It’s a teaching. And the first words are “you think you are the home of evil” and all kinds of words that go along with evil. And that if anybody saw how terrible you were they would want …you would want to die at your own hand, going on would be too much. Everybody is carrying the same beliefs in their mind of their darkness. So, how is that identity of darkness going to be honest to bring it to the light? It’s not. It’s not. That’s not the way of the ego’s nature. The ego’s nature is not going to volunteer. But the Holy Spirit is going to gently let you see the mistaken ideas of your identity. And all that you have to do is hold the Hand of Love and be willing to recognize “yes, that those are my beliefs. That’s my envy. That’s my jealousy. That’s my greed. Those are my lies that I told. Those are my manipulations.”

Now in the willingness…if you can say YES, and really want that to be healed, it will be healed. It will be healed because you’re willing to look at it for what it is – that it was never your friend, that it was always fear, that it was always desperation that it was always the belief that you didn’t have worth.

It was always based on lies and that’s what’s coming for healing – all the lies. “I made it up. And I lied to myself about what I made up because I was afraid to not have an important identity. I was scared to look.”

This is the same addiction that anybody has that is addicted to any kind of substance. A heroin addict will go through exactly the same thing. You put a heroin addict in rehab and they will be afraid of the same things. They will be afraid of the lies that they’ve told, of the people they’ve disappointed, of the disregard for others, of the facades that they wanted to build and hide behind because of their pain, because of their fear. It’s the same thing. The addiction of the ego is the source of all worldly addictions and is strong within whatever form it uses. The addict that’s in rehab is able to take that leap of faith because it’s based on the recognition of a Higher Power. It’s in the recognition that they are addicted. And you all have to come to the awareness of the addiction of the ego. Of how much fear you have used to try to survive. And how none of it was the Truth. Allowing Spirit to bring it to the Light. Really wanting it to be healed because it has no reality. Really embracing forgiveness and accepting you were mistaken. And this is your own healing. This is maybe the first time that you would have a connection with actual Love.

The upsidedowness that you have believed in for century after century, lifetime after lifetime, that this upsidedowness is being turned right side up so that you can see it in its authenticity. The protection that you want to build and hold for the ego is keeping you out of the awareness of Love. When you will be able to say to the Holy Spirit “YES, I’m going to forgive myself for all of these lies, the greed, the jealousy, the envy, whatever it was…this is not the Truth of me and I am surrendering this.” And, this surrender may be the first inkling, the first touching that you would have with real Love. That you would be touching into a place of Love because you would be willing to see the lies and see them for what they are.

That would be the generosity, the honesty, the compassion of Love that you would be offering to your Self by saying “YES, I want this to be healed,” because that is the loving thing to do with this journey. This is the journey of Love. And to surrender to the Holy Spirit is Loving. It is the Love that you barely remember, but it’s Love. It’s Love because it’s generous, because it’s honest, because it’s Truth, because it’s God’s reality. God’s reality is that you are innocent. And you are then joining with that innocence. You are joining with the innocence of Love and saying “YES, I want this healed. I’m willing. I’m willing to see what I made up and I’m willing to turn it over…to disown the past with all the lies.” And, the most amazing thing will happen to you in the healing. Because it is so much like someone who has been addicted to whatever it is being able to finally stand up and say “I was addicted to that. I was addicted to it and now I am saying NO, I don’t want this anymore. I want to remember Love. I want to come home to Love.” That’s all that anything is about, coming home to Love.

Why is it so difficult to open that door? You’ve spent lifetimes trying to protect an image and it’s never worked, because the fear grips you and goes with you everywhere. There’s no respite in the hiding. And the other thing that the hiding does, which is such a typical ego thing to do, is that when you’re hiding your mistakes, your errors, your imagination makes them bigger and bigger. Your imagination, your fantasies get bigger and bigger about all that you’ve believed about yourself. The crimes become bigger, the wrongdoings become huge, and you’re terrified of them because you keep holding onto them instead of “Holy Spirit, I made these up. I made these up and I used them, and I tried to gain from them, but I was mistaken. I was mistaken. And I’m here to forgive myself for all the Beloveds that I was jealous of, that I was envious of, that I was lying to, that I was afraid of.”

I was afraid of so many…I was afraid of the beloveds who came as my children. I was terrified of them. I was terrified of them…I had no idea what to do with them. And I was terrified because I knew that I was going to be a terrible parent. That was my secret. Afraid of children. To give that back to God and say “this can’t be the truth. This can’t be. You’ve promised that the past is a fantasy. It’s an illusion. And so it must be. And so I have to surrender. It doesn’t matter when. It doesn’t matter that they were no longer children. I was not able to love. I had no connection to Love. Every decision I made for them was based on fear. Fear for me, not fear for them. Fear for me.”

That is the place that all the healing occurs in. The Light comes through, and you are released from the burden of the lies that seem so real. And you stand up to the Truth. It’s not about apologizing. That’s what the ego would love you to think. “Please apologize!” That’s the ego whispering… “Please apologize!” Grovel, apologize. No! Forgiveness is not about apologizing. Forgiveness is about acknowledging “I was mistaken. I forgive myself for having been mistaken. Nobody else did anything. I was mistaken.”

I wasn’t there to parse who was in my life that was just as faulty as I was. Not my business. It was not my business to see who in my life was complicit in my lies and join me in being a liar. Join me in my made up identities. Not my business. My business was to forgive myself for holding every single one of them in a false identity. That was my business. Those were my lies.

It’s turning it upside down, right side up that you discover that Love is there in the forgiveness. Love is blooming from the honesty. From the recognition “I was mistaken. I don’t know who I am, but thank God, thank God God knows the Truth.” You don’t have to figure out how you’re going to unravel anything. The Holy Spirit does all of that completely. Completely.

Wait for the Holy Spirit to guide you or you will add ego onto him.

Now there’s a choice. Wait for the Holy Spirit to guide you or if you try to take the situation and make sense out of it with your mind, you will be putting the ego on the Holy Spirit and you won’t recognize the Holy Spirit anymore. You’re just bringing willingness – that’s it. But, it’s everything because it’s all that there is. All that there is. Trust in your willingness. It would seem that there wouldn’t be much to trust because all it is is willingness. But, again, it’s all that’s needed. And what’s so important about it is that it leaves the room open for the Divine’s Creative healing. It puts you into the Divine Hospital so that you can be attended to because you’re willing to be there.

You’re not kicking and screaming. You’re not resistant. You’re not reluctant. You’re not begrudging it. You’re saying “YES! YES! Come and heal me as I sleep.” I used to say that prayer every night. “Come and heal me as I sleep. I’m available. I’m willing. Whatever you want to heal while I’m sleeping, I’m ready. If it takes 100 years to heal all this insanity, I’m willing.” But I’m going to just keep moving toward that healing.

Forever, forever, forever, para sempre, para sempre, forever I am with God. Forever, forever, forever I am with God.

Let that sing in your heart while you invite the Holy Spirit for healing. There is nothing that you’re going to see about healing that should be that shocking. Mainly because it was what you walked. It’s just the willingness to shed the Light on it…whatever it is. Always remembering that there is no difference between an irritation, or pure out hatred, murder, whatever. So, it doesn’t matter. It’s all a mistake. To hold that you want to murder somebody is also a mistake. But the hatred that goes with it has to be brought to the Light, too. To really want to murder somebody pours like a poison through the system.

I saw myself as a potential murderer. I believed I had the capacity to murder. That I would have murdered. Was it a mistake, or was it condemnation? That was my choice. God was saying it was a mistake. It was a mistaken identity. It was a mistaken identity within a fantasy of a life that wasn’t the Truth. I had to accept that and that I was not cursed by my murderous thoughts. Because, they weren’t just thoughts. They carried all the energy of actually going through with it, of wanting that person dead, and being glad to be the one to be able to do it.

Is that different from anything else? No it isn’t. It’s a mistake. It’s a mistake. Was I tarnished by that? No, I was not. It was a mistake. Everything you carry of what you think you are, is not the Truth. Here’s the thing with healing. It’s because you’re not just asking for healing from the lies, the deception, the murderous thoughts. You’re wanting to be free of the concept of a personal self. Free of having to prove worth all the time, of having to align yourself to be better than because you believe in scarcity. We have all believed in scarcity. We have believed that there wasn’t enough. How does that translate? It translates into that everything becomes a worry.

Are you going to have enough? Is there going to be enough for you? And everybody has felt the yuck, for the lack of a better term, the yuck of somebody else having something and you wanting it. “How did they get that? How come I don’t have that?” And in fear, burying that as quickly as possible because you don’t want anybody to be aware of it. But, it’s there. And it’s because the belief, the main belief in the belief of separation is scarcity. It’s essential to the ego’s makeup. It’s essential for fear to rule that everybody believe that there isn’t enough. Through this false belief, you are basically at war with everyone around you. You’re secretly thinking, “wait a minute, I want that. Why are you here? If you’re here, I can’t have that.” And the belief in scarcity runs the universe of the ego, completely. But, everybody has this system that’s been so refined that as soon as the jealousy or envy or whatever it is, or greed or whatever or however it comes out, as soon as that hits, it’s shoved away, it is justified, and you activate your role as a victim. Scarcity affirms the role of the victim. And then the mask is back on of “oh no, it’s fine, except I wanted it.”

These are all mistakes because there is no scarcity. That’s all made up. Everybody’s believed it. When you go to bed hungry, you believe there’s scarcity. When you wake up hungry, you believe that there’s scarcity. When everything is cold because there’s no heat, you believe that there’s scarcity. But, this is not the Truth. This is the nightmare that you made that has no Truth to it. And the willingness is to accept that, that you are the innocence and Light of God. How difficult is that to just accept it? Right now! [simulates choking] “No, no, I don’t want to accept it. No, no, no.” That’s how resistant the ego can be. Playing such a game. That your heart would just say “Yes! I want this. I want to accept this. I want to come home. I want to remember”. And your ego is saying “nope. Nope.” And you believe that voice.

You believe the ego. Don’t believe the ego. Please! It’s so ridiculous. It’s so ridiculous. It’s just following the same old stuff and at some point, everybody is going to say NO. Embrace the right use of denial. “No, I’m not buying this anymore. I’m not playing this game anymore”. And start looking at the tiredness of playing the game, of how tiring it is to play the game. To take care of a façade is a lot of work. It’s a lot of labor intensive work. And, it’s so tiring. It’s like being a professional liar. How does a professional liar live their life and keep track of the lies that they tell? It’s impossible. So you have to …make a script. Don’t give the ego your script. Don’t follow the ways of the past. There’s just nothing there for you.

The Truth of your being is wanting to be brought to illumination. But nobody can bring your being to illumination except your choice. That’s it. Thank God it doesn’t take a huge amount, but it does take all the willingness that you have. And the thing with willingness is that the ego would also like you to believe that you could just say “I’m willing. I’m willing. Okay.” And then, the next day, you don’t have to be willing. But it’s beginning again over and over and over again. “I’m still willing. I’m still willing Holy Spirit. I’m willing. In case I forget, I’m willing. This is what I want. This is what I’m here for.” And you call on all the Masters that you could and there are plenty of Masters that are so willing to help. Every single one of them is the Divine Teacher of Love. And everyone has the Guides that are necessary. There’s no one that has more Guides than somebody else. If you have one Guide that is supposed to be your Guide, it’s because the Holy Spirit knows exactly that you will do better with that one guide for now.

You’re comparing to somebody else…somebody else says “I have three Guides.” “Why do they have three guides, I only have one Guide?” You don’t have to spend any time on ego identity with one, two, three or anything else. If you have one Guide, it’s because that is the perfect guide for you. If you have three Guides, it’s because the Holy Spirit has deemed it that three would be helpful for you. Sometimes a Guide will come in and then the Guide…when their piece of work is finished with you, then they go back here [gestures] and another one comes in and they are all working in unison for you because you are so loved. The guidance is there because we can’t remember without guidance. We can’t separate our thoughts and come up with conclusions.

This is what the ego loves. The ego loves it when somebody has thoughts and their thinking thoughts about what the healing is and how it should go instead of “I don’t know. I don’t know. All I’m saying is I’m willing and I forgive myself for everything I made up. It’s not God’s will for me to suffer.” Let that be your prayer. It’s not God’s will for you to suffer. Not at all.

How long will this pain go on Dear Lord? This grief I can hardly bear.
How long will anguish grip me in this illusion, And agony ring in my mind?

Light up my eyes with your presence.
Let me feel your Love in my bones.
Keep me from losing myself in ignorance and despair. Teach me to be patient Dear Lord.
Teach me to be endlessly patient.
Let me trust that your Love enfolds me.
When my heart feels desolate and dry.
I will sing to the Lord at all times
Even from the depths of pain.

Even from anywhere I will keep saying “show me the way. Show me the way. Show me the way. It’s all that I want. It’s all that my living is for. Show me the way.”

You have everything because you have willingness. You have everything because this is where your journey has brought you. To these incredibly deep teachings that will take you and take you and take you. That you never have to wonder about the Truth because you have so much that reflects the Truth. Willing to be shown. Willing to learn. Willing to be healed.

The Heart says YES.

Chris Celine © 2017

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